Kevin finds his birthday kind of depressing. He sees it as a yearly reminder of all that he hasn’t accomplished or done by this age. When he was younger and dealing with Type 1 Diabetes, he honestly didn’t think he’d make it to 30. Now that he’s made it well beyond that, he feels that he should have something more significant to show for his half a century plus.
From what he’s told me, an impressive career, or at least one that would make finances not such a major concern, getting a couple of his inventions patented, getting a condo or a house, his dream car, having the ability to take an actual vacation to somewhere fun and/or exotic, something to show for his community service and being a good neighbor are at least some of what he believes would give his life more meaning, significance, worth. (Without saying it out loud, I know that he would also feel more important or valuable if we were parents. But we're not and may never be.)
I understand this discouraged, self-bashing birthday sentiment. I have often dreaded my own birthday for the same reason: another year has passed, and I still have nothing major to show for my life, work, or impact on the world.
This morning, I looked out the window at Kevin on his motorcycle as he was heading off to work. Riding is one of the few luxuries in life that he has and still enjoys. My prayer for him, other than that he will be kept safe, is that he would know how he has made a difference and glorified God by the many small and big things he has done with great love.
I have known him for the past 18 years, and I honestly can’t imagine who I would be or where I would be without him playing a starring role in my life. Most of the time, he doesn’t recognize or accept that who he is and how he is are gifts to everyone around him. His enthusiasm, smile, quick wit, encouragement, and hard work combined with the fact that he genuinely cares about people all make a lasting impression, whether he realizes it or not.
Lord, please allow Kevin to see and accept the many ways he is who and where You want and need him to be right now. Help him focus on You, above everyone and everything else, so that his sense of worth, value, and significance are affirmed by the Truth and Love with which You have created him to be Your holy servant. Amen.