“Can I stay with you? Can I stay with you, please?” I asked in my best imitation of Eddie Murphy as Donkey in Shrek. I didn’t get any
response. I hung up hoping my friend
would be amused by the message I left on her voicemail and still be willing to
let me sleep on her pull-out couch while I figured out new living
arrangements.
After graduating
from college in May 2003, I immediately began courses to get my Masters. I had been working with a family as tutor,
homeschool helper, babysitter, etc. during my senior year at Hollins
University, so when looking into various lodging options, they offered to let me
rent a room from them that summer.
That’s how their schoolroom became my bedroom for a time. It worked out pretty well. The family is devoutly Catholic, so I could
help the kids with all of their homeschool subjects, including religion, and I
joined them nightly in the mother’s room to pray the family Rosary. My classes were in the evenings, so I could
be at home with the kids during the day while their mom was at work, then I
could make dinner and eat with them before I went to class.
 |
| Kevin and me after my undergrad graduation in May 2003. |
During that
summer, I met with my friend Martha whom I had gotten to know through our involvement
in Catholic Campus Ministry (CCM) at Hollins.
She brought her best friend, Nel, whom I had also gotten to know through
CCM but hadn’t seen in a while. The
three of us had a great time catching up over lunch, often quoting lines from
the recent blockbuster hit movie Shrek. None of us knew at the time how that lunch
would be a jumping off point for greater blessings.
Within the next of couple weeks (if not the next few days) I suddenly found myself in need of a new place to
stay. I was stunned and heartbroken that I wouldn’t
be helping out with the kids, even if living somewhere else, but I had enough
peace and reserve to move forward when I got very clearly “you’ve done what I sent
you here to do.” It wasn’t an audible
voice, but a deep knowing in my heart that it was time to move on. That reassurance from the Holy Spirit and the
new door that had opened gave me the courage to move forward.
 |
| Me and Nel at the Sept. 4, 2004 wedding reception after Kevin and I finally got married after many, many years of talking about it & looking forward to it. |
Kevin had moved
to Richmond by then, so he was often able to come and visit me in Roanoke the year before our wedding. . He was quite relieved that I’d found a
happier living situation and made a new life-long best friend. Of course, he got along wonderfully with Nel
as he has with all of my close friends and had fun hanging out at our apartment
(which, unlike the place Kevin and I currently live in, had both a dishwasher
and a washer and dryer in it).
What
felt like a door slamming in my face actually opened the way for new
friendships and adventures I wouldn’t have had otherwise. I try to remember these sorts of experiences
when one friendship ends or becomes more distant, when a job is over, a move is
necessary, and/or God makes it clear that He’s got something else in
store. I find that I am most determined to do what God asks of me or nudges me to do when I’m clear that it’s His Will. I don’t have to understand it or be even be happy about it, but if through prayer, discernment, spiritual direction, and other indicators I’m led to a particular path, then eventually, ready or not, there, with the grace of God, go I.
