My mom took my grandmother, sisters, and me on a pilgrimage
to a house of prayer in Ireland to receive a special blessing the summer after
my sophomore year of college. For my
sisters and I, this was a first. We’d
never been to Europe or gone on an official pilgrimage. In more ways than one my experience in
Ireland foreshadowed what my junior year studying abroad in Paris would be
like.
My mom wanted to
take all of us on the pilgrimage, but one of my sisters wasn’t sure if she
wanted to go. She had joined a nearby
Presbyterian Church and wasn’t sure about coming with us on a pilgrimage to a Marian house of prayer. Mom asked her to
pray about it. When she did, she was led
to a Bible verse. When she checked out
the website for the house of prayer, she saw the exact same Bible verse on
there, and that was sign enough for her that God wanted her to come with
us. 
I brought a photo
of Kevin and me together to put in the box of prayer intentions at the chapel
in the house of prayer. I prayed for us
often during that visit, not just at the house of prayer, but also when we
stayed at the Connemara Coast Hotel. 
I had lots of
time to pray, read the Bible, and write since I wasn’t able to adjust to the
time change. I shared a room with my
youngest sister and didn’t want to keep her awake at night, so I sat in the
bathroom where the light wouldn’t disturb her and prayed, wrote notes to Kevin,
and filled up page after page of hotel stationery with possible Scripture
readings for our wedding, along with hymns, and even a preliminary guest list. 
During our stay
on the Connemara Coast, I would usually sleep during the day while Mom, Grandma
(my maternal grandmother), and my sisters went sightseeing. I’d wake up in the afternoon and walk to the
nearby church. Mary Mother of the Sea
Church had a labyrinth walk in the courtyard.
For the first few days I did the labyrinth walk, I unknowingly went
about it wrong. I started on the outside
and went in, but then I left. I finally
got a pamphlet from the church explaining the labyrinth walk, and from then on
I knew to contemplate my inward journey with God while going to the center of
the circle, then meditate on outreach from self to others and the world while
retracing my steps back out.
“Can I stay with you? Can I stay with you, please?” I asked in my best imitation of Eddie Murphy as Donkey in Shrek. I didn’t get any
response. I hung up hoping my friend
would be amused by the message I left on her voicemail and still be willing to
let me sleep on her pull-out couch while I figured out new living
arrangements.  |
| Kevin and me after my undergrad graduation in May 2003. |
During that
summer, I met with my friend Martha whom I had gotten to know through our involvement
in Catholic Campus Ministry (CCM) at Hollins.
She brought her best friend, Nel, whom I had also gotten to know through
CCM but hadn’t seen in a while. The
three of us had a great time catching up over lunch, often quoting lines from
the recent blockbuster hit movie Shrek. None of us knew at the time how that lunch
would be a jumping off point for greater blessings. |
| Me and Nel at the Sept. 4, 2004 wedding reception after Kevin and I finally got married after many, many years of talking about it & looking forward to it. |
I’m reminded of the last few years of my dad’s life, when his health declined rapidly. Suddenly, he needed help with things. It got to the point at which it was too exhausting for him to do his own grocery shopping, so I’d usually take care of it. Just walking around his little apartment, he’d get out of breath, though, he wore oxygen all the time. 
Maybe it just means that we’re still human when we feel hurt, pain, and sorrow mixed in with our gratitude and/or perhaps it indicates that we aren’t as close to the Lord as we could be. I don’t know. I know some very strong, courageous, grateful people who have felt discouraged, downtrodden, and frustrated. What if it’s not an either/or but a both/and? We can be both grateful for what we do have and still have a tug in our heart for an area of our lives that is missing, lost, or painful. 
A dear family friend of ours from Kenya who came here with her children many years ago is one person who really impressed upon me the importance of thanking God in advance for what we have asked Him to do in our lives.
Grace is…realizing again that God
has been answering prayers you prayed over a decade ago in miraculous and
hope-inspiring ways, offering your prayer intentions at Mass for someone who is
struggling in mind, body, and/or spirit, finding out something hurtful and
frustrating happened completely due to a misunderstanding and both sides
feeling much better once given the chance to clear the air, having hope when it
could only mean having faith in God’s plans for your future even when He hasn’t
made any of them clear to you, yet, having dinner and time to visit with three adorable little girls who are way cuter than any Disney Princesses…
Honoring Our Departed Loved Ones
Four years ago, I went by myself to an All Soul’s Day (November 2) service
our parish had. There were a number of
people I added to the list of the faithful departed loved ones that year, my
dad being just one of them. I wasn’t
sure how well I’d hold up, and really wished Kevin had agreed to come with
me. Being there and offering our sorrow
and sadness to the Lord and having the courage to get up in front of others and
speak a few words about the loved ones we’d lost recently was quite
powerful. So many friends and family
members have lost loved ones this year.
It is my hope and prayer that they will also find comfort and courage
that there is indeed life after this one, and that we will again be with those we
love in the next life. My grandmother passed away this last January. I will be praying for her this evening and for all who are mourning the loss of loved ones. This is the reflection I wrote about the All Soul’s Day service.
new
job, and we are bracing ourselves as his severance package which includes our
insurance coverage ends on November 12.
I have confidence that the Lord will lead Kevin to a job that is a
better fit for him, more fulfilling, and incorporates more of his skills and
talents, but his hope is running low the longer he waits. He’s frustrated and angry that so many
contradicting things are said and advised, and he’s not sure which to
follow. It’s easier for me to look at this situation and have faith that things will work out, because he’s a hard worker, fast-learner, awesome at customer service, great at sales, very gifted in a number of other areas, in addition to being a good, compassionate person...than it is for
him to trust at this point.
Thanks to everyone for the birthday wishes and prayers! Here in completely random order are some
blessings for which I am truly grateful.
·
My mom
·
Pens, paper, and pretty stationary
·
My family
This afternoon, I
was smitten to discover I had time to get to Mass at the church where I’d first
met Michele and where we’d most often gone to pray together. I saw many of the regulars Kevin and I have prayed
with at daily Mass when we’ve gone St. Benedict’s at 5:30pm Tuesday-Fridays over
the past three years. It felt good to be
surrounded by a number of familiar prayer warriors and the faith community who
welcomed Michele as one of their own.
St. Benedict’s was also the last place in Richmond where Michele
performed Teresita, an original play she wrote based on the life of St. Teresa of Avila, a little over one year after the debut of her show at St. Benedict's School on
July 17 (the Feast Day of Our Lady of Mount Carmel).
Life-giving Choices This is a message from a woman who took great joy in having each one of
her children and strongly believes that women deserve better than what society
offers as a solution for unplanned pregnancies: “Last night, several were blessed to attend
the fundraising gala for the new East End Pregnancy Test and Help Centerin Richmond. The organizers of the evening were so inspirational! But the
news that they bring is serious. In the 23223 area code where the new Center is
located, the abortion rate is over 60%. Yes, this is very serious.
The pastors who attended are sure that their congregations are being targeted
for abortion. Please pray for all those who have opened their doors and who are
working to assist the families most vulnerable to abortion in our
communities, the Pregnancy Resource Center, Catholic Charities, and
now the East End Pregnancy Test and Help Center.” –Ann Niermeyer (aka my
mom & Richmond, VA 40 Days for Life leader.)
